Disadvantages Of Internet Dating Essay

Updates: 07/13/2014

What are pros and cons of online dating? Rather than helping you get into a relationship, what online dating could do for you? What are the realities of Internet dating? To make use of this type of dating, you had better beware of its advantages and disadvantages. Read on the whole article below to discover the complete list of pros and cons of online dating!

List Of Pros And Cons Of Online Dating You Need To Know – Top 20 Tips 

I. Pros And Cons Of Online Dating – Advantages Of Online Dating

1. Online Dating Works

Perhaps, you might be a little skeptical about the opportunities of success, yet you really should not be. Obviously, there is no guarantee that using a dating website will help you meet your ideal partner, yet you are certainly gives yourself increased chances. When looking at any online dating sites, you will see a variety of testimonials from real couples who found romance love via online dating. In simple words, online dating does work and has successfully helped thousands of couples all over the world.

2. Easy To Get Started

We all know that signing up an online dating website is so easy and quick. All you need is a laptop or computer and to set up an Internet connection, then you will be ready to get started. After you get there, you just need to enter some basic information and details about yourself in order to get an account. Then, you just need to spend some time to prepare your own profile which will help others find and understand about you. Once you have done it, start sending as well as receiving messages from other members on that website. It also means that you have started your online dating adventure. Moreover, you can do this right from the comfort of your own home.

Related: 76 dating advice for women

3. Have Chance To Meet Like-Minded People

If you want to meet someone special in your life, it may be hard to know the best places to look for. By using such online dating website, you can make sure that the people you are meeting are also looking for the same thing as you. At the majority of dating websites, members’ profiles include specific information about the sort of relationship they are looking for. Therefore, once you want to look for a long-term relationship, you will search for other people who also want the same. And, in case that you just want to meet people on a casual basis, then that is also possible.

4. Improvise Your Dating Skills

No matter you are single or already in a relationship, it is so important for you to look for new dating ideas. You need to know what you should wear or not, where should you go to have a romantic date, and how to keep the fire of love. As you date online, you can find cool ideas involving a lot of topics. That can help improve your dating skills interestingly.

5. Go On With A Flirting Prowl

With online dating, until you find someone really special to you, you can flirt with many members of the dating website. This is unlike traditional dating. Traditional dating might take too much to understand each other, yet online dating is incredibly fast. Concurrently, by flirting with many people, you can compare them to know who is suitable for you. In fact, the best thing is that you could do it anonymously in your privacy.

Related: Secrets of flirting with men

6. Common Ground

As online dating can take lots of guess work before getting started. In order to contact with someone, you have to research their profile beforehand, this will give you a chance to find out information about them, and reduce the chances of having a date with someone you have nothing in common with. Many online dating sites are specific to some certain cultures or religions, as well as other criteria. If you want to meet someone who has a particular background or faith, just use a specialist online dating site.

7. Lots To Choose From

When using dating online services, you can have a plethora of chances and a wide range of choices to find a partner. Having an ensured variety of choices is wonderful change from the traditional form of dating when it used to be difficult to meet people in good match.

8. Less Pressure

Dating websites are places for everyone, who wants to look for the right people. Dating websites are useful because many people are shy or nervous when they have to face with others. Through these websites, there is less pressure for them when sending messages. The benefit of online dating is getting a pleasant atmosphere where you have much time to consider about what you intend to say without being nervous about things crossing into your mind. Moreover, the normal improvement of online dating through online messaging before meeting someone let you become more comfortable with others before the first date. This limits the stress to give you an unforgettable dating experience.

9. Increase Likelihood Of Compatibility 

Two ways are applied by online dating services to increase the likelihood of compatibility. Firstly, the great numbers of members at these online websites widens the volume of candidates. The dating sites supply filters to ensure that you can meet quality people as you expect. The second is that online dating encourages you through online chatting, phone conversations, and meeting in person. That lets you understand one another before having the first date. In addition, you can learn many helpful things from other members and from their dating profile.

10. Full Disclosure

Online dating websites let you specify your intentions and expectations in the beginning; therefore, you can easily look for people who have the same things as you such as characteristic, interests, and so on… If you are looking for a partner, this way can thwart you from wasting a lot of time through casual dating. The advantage of this way helps you prevent disappointments and misunderstanding.

11. Avoid Embarrassment 

Next to pros and cons of online dating, we can confess that online dating may help you avoid embarrassment. Firstly, you don’t have to get rejected or you don’t need to turn someone down. Secondly, people have the difficulty in expressing the feelings and thoughts when having face-to-face meeting because they feel embarrassed and shy to talk about them. Nonetheless, they tend to disclose about themselves when they write online, which allows you to understand them better. In conclusion, online dating makes people more comfortable to open up.

See: Ways To Start A Conversation.

II. Pros And Cons Of Online Dating – Disadvantages Of Online Dating

1. Scammers

Online dating websites make it so easy for those scammers to find and then target you. Actually, they can create false profiles, in which they enter fake information as well as photos. Even, they could spend a few weeks on trying to make you trust. Finally, they will tell you that they have some types of medical or travel emergency, and of course, they need your help, particularly with money. Then, they promise to pay you back once they can handle the situation, yet they seem disappear after getting money from you.

Learn ways to detect liars and cheaters here to avoid being scammed.

2. Security

Though online dating sites have some specific privacy policies, few of them employ HTTPS, standard Web encryption that keeps the information safe as it is sent and received over the Internet. Therefore, anyone who monitors an unsecured wireless connection could obtain your own username and view the profiles you visit, and your own messages. With such information, people could easily hack your account.

Another aspect when it comes to security of online dating is safety. In simple words, when you meet someone in person through online dating sites, just ensure that you meet them in a busy place where you can seek for a help if necessary. Do not give out every personal detail like your address until you know them much better.

3. Expectations Are Not Met

When connecting with someone, you would always have certain expectations. In online dating, you could never get the real intentions of a person. Because the communicating is not direct, so you will imagine different mental pictures of that person in your head. When meeting that person in person, your imagination might be similar to the reality.  It turns to be a disappointing experience as the interaction online and in person seems different.

See: advice for successful online dating.

4. Barrier Of Distance

When meeting a person online who you could have eventually have a connection with, chances are she or he is residing in different state or country. This barrier of distance will become the hardest gap to fill as travel fares might not be cheap. Long-distance relationships are extremely difficult, particularly at the beginning. If you do not limit your search to people who live within a short distance of yourself, you will have to deal with such problem at some point. Thought there are also some dating sites that match your compatibility based on geography and interests. Unfortunately, these things might not be an exact measure of whether two of you are good match or not.

Check out: advice for long-distance relationship and ways to warm up your love effectively.

5. Cost

While dating via Internet might at first seem cheaper than “traditional dating”, the truth is that most matchmaking websites charge a fee towards their members. This fee might not be all inclusive, sometimes it could be added up. Apart from basic membership fee, you might have to pay additionally fee to get messages, expand your current profile, or contact members. Therefore, it is better for you to know what the fee contains before signing up the website. By this way, you can save a moderate amount of money. Also, you might not be able to see the type of advertisements available on that site until you pay for certain fee. However, if you do it, it is not always guaranteed that there is someone who matches with your preferences or taste.

6. No Surprises

When it comes to pros and cons of online dating, you should accept the truth about surprise. It may lose some elements of surprise by making use of these dating tools. It seems like something is missing when you find that you already know someone before meeting in meeting. Because every date involving online dating is scanned and planned, there is not much random surprise aspect that brings two strangers together.

Discover relationships tips for men and women:

7. Damage To Your Reputation

This seems to be rare when it comes to cons of online dating, yet you should not know it in advance. The intimate information you share online, whether sexual practices, photos, or any sensitive matter, could come back to haunt you. Unfortunately, the legal system might not supply much in the way of remedies for online defamation. Also, the Internet now has a permanent memory. In other words, even your attempts to protect your private information or reputation could backfire on you. For those niche communities which might have good reason to keep personal or sensitive information such as HIV-positive or LGBT individuals, a discovery of this type can have devastating personal outcomes. So, you should be very careful about what you disclose, both personal information and photos.

8. Chemistry

It cannot be deniable that the appearances aren’t everything, but the important role of chemistry determines whether a relationship works. The appearance, body language, and voice one determine people’s attraction. None of them will be assessed through ads. Moreover, many people writing the online ad can leave out many bad and negative sides like a serious disease. Even through an online ad, people seem to match the look you like, chemistry may not be guesses. Therefore, you may send your valuable time on a virtual relationship that cannot work.

See: dating tips and advice

9. To Be Addictive 

It can be realized that online dating is an interesting way for people to meet and make acquaintances with others. Although it can lead to many detrimental things for their social lives, some people are strongly addicted to it. When you abuse your time to be in front of computer, you may miss the real opportunities of meeting someone individually. Thanks to online dating, some people can find out the love of their life, but finding love may be tricky.

There are many pros and cons of online dating that we might not list down here due to the limitation of time. Try to be realistic, honest, mindful, and skeptical of what you are looking for, so you can find potential, even ideal mates.

Leave your ideas at the end of this list of pros and cons of online dating, including 20 tips to let us know what you think. We will respond all as soon as possible.

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Last Updated: October 13, 2017 by Brown

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Welcome back to The Attraction Doctor

Experiences with online dating tend to be mixed. Some people have excellent experiences with online dating that end in satisfying relationships. Others have stories filled with confusion and frustration. Thus, much like any other way to date, meeting someone online has both benefits and drawbacks.

So, how does someone date online successfully? As it turns out, a simple analysis of the pros and cons of online dating can help out a great deal. Fortunately, the psychological research just happens to have such an analysis.

An Analysis of Online Dating

Finkel and associates (2012) put together an extremely comprehensive review of the literature investigating various aspects of online dating. The goal of their review was to evaluate whether online dating was 1) fundamentally different from face-to-face dating and 2) was superior. Results of their assessment indicated that dating online was indeed different from "traditional" dating in a number of ways. It also provided some superior features and potential problems.

Overall, Finkel and associates (2012) found that online dating differed in three main areas:

1) Access

Pros: Online dating provided individuals with access to many more potential partners than they could often find in their daily lives. This is especially true for individuals interested in partners of a particular type, orientation, lifestyle, or in isolated areas.

Cons: The choices of partners can become confusing and overwhelming. Without a clear plan, online daters can get stuck endlessly "shopping" for the perfect partner, rather than actually starting a satisfying relationship.

2) Matching

Pros: Many online dating sites offer various types of personality testing and matching. Such matching can help guide individuals toward dating partners who may be more compatible.

Cons: Matching is a difficult process and testing may not be accurate for everyone. In addition, people may present differently in person or change over time. So, matching may overlook potentially good partners in the process.

3) Communication

Pros: Online dating offers a number of ways to get to know a potential date before meeting in person. Such computer-mediated communication allows for safe and convenient interaction, without much risk or time commitment. For the busy professional, or the safety-conscious, such communication is an excellent way to "test" potential partners.

Cons: Communication through computers is lacking some of the information provided in face-to-face interaction. As a result, it is harder to evaluate a potential match online. Also, some of the cues and features that build attraction (like touching) cannot be accomplished through a computer. So, such computer-mediated communication may have an artificial and unemotional quality.

Using Online Dating to Your Advantage

Clearly, the features of online dating have both costs and benefits. So, how do you make the most of your dating experience online? Here are a few suggestions...

Access - Having choices is wonderful, but keep them manageable. If you want an actual face-to-face dating interaction, then don't get stuck endlessly "browsing" online. Instead, narrow your search to a small location, or a certain set of "must have" features. After your narrow it down, rather than just "shopping", talk to those who make the list. To ensure success among your many options, make sure you have at least a general idea of what you're looking for in a partner, and what you are offering them too. (For more on those topics, see here, here, and here).

Matching - Online tests may not be able to tell you your perfect match, but they can help narrow down the options. In particular, such testing often identifies potential daters who would be a poor relationship partner for anyone. Thus, while you may have to date a few matches to find out who is a good fit for you, matching can help you avoid those who might be a disaster. Beyond that, it might be best to trust your unconscious feelings too as your implicit "gut reactions" can have a big impact on attraction. (For more, see here and here).

Communication - Online communication is designed to make an initial connection, not set the foundation for a whole relationship. So, keep initial online conversation focused on finding out the basics quickly, then setting up an actual date. Generally, a few short emails or quick conversations will suffice. Long introductory emails may be counter-productive and off-putting too. Save it for a date. If you are crunched for time, then meet for coffee (see here). If you still have safety concerns, meet in a public place. (For more on asking for a date, see here).

Conclusion

Overall, it is important to remember that online dating is best used as a resource to meet individuals for eventual face-to-face dating. Keeping that goal in mind will prevent you from getting stuck on the drawbacks and limitations of dating online. So, if you get confused, the best next step is always to move an interaction toward a date. If you are overwhelmed with access to too many choices, then find a way to narrow them down and find better matches. If you don't know what to do with a potential match, send them a quick communication. If you get frustrated with talking online, then suggest a meeting in person. Follow that process and you will more easily find a satisfying connection online and face-to-face too.

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Until next time...happy dating and relating!

Dr. Jeremy Nicholson
The Attraction Doctor

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Reference

  • Finkel, E.J., Eastwick, P.W., Karney, B., Reis, H.T., & Sprecher, S. (2012). Online dating: A critical analysis from the perspective of psychological science. Psychological Science, 13(1), 3-66.

© 2014 by Jeremy S. Nicholson, M.A., M.S.W., Ph.D. All rights reserved.

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